Saturday, July 1, 2017

Invited then uninvited to a wedding...

https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Lv36fCR3ujo/WVf1BvGy07I/AAAAAAAACyE/_57d074pv68lDRDLWhXhYtxbJs_umqd5wCK4BGAYYCw/s1600/62255139%255B1%255D-781989.jpg
Invited then uninvited to a wedding...
Invited then uninvited to a wedding...
Invited to my son's wedding, I proposed we all meet up prior to arrival to ensure all parties were present prior to the ceremony to ensure there were no interruptions.
I offered my opinion on their idea of getting dressed in formal wedding attire merely to hold their ceremony in front of a county judge in a busy courthouse and passing through metal detectors and sitting rank and file with those awaiting arraignment as a bit overboard and likened it to being on Jerry Springer adding I thought it might be more acceptable to do so if they were in Vegas or Atlantic City.
I proceeded to arrange a last gathering between father and son prior to the day with my son to finalize our meeting time and date by phone the next day after work.
I was emailed an in-invitation telling me I was vulgar and insulted them both separately and as a couple with the closing line of "Please make things easier for everyone and just not arrive."
The letter was most obviously not from my son as it began very formally and progressively became more emotional, more personal, and more retaliatory as though I had somehow attacked them, or her, while arranging for a night out with my Jr.
Yeah, well, anyway...
Here's a draft I wrote but have not [yet] sent and/or may not send.



The message was most obviously not written by the person I helped raise.
My son neither speaks nor writes that way.
Frankly, I don't believe he perceives any intent or speech from me in that way.
My son knows who and how I am in a multitude of circumstances and under duress of a number stimuli.
All things come in due time.
I do not need nor do I desire your approval of me as a human being Katie.
Continue to put yourself on that pedestal and one day others will tire of holding you up as you look down upon them.
I don't believe Jr. will see this nor do I believe he gets receipt of my messages and/or calls but, Jr. should you read this message please note it was written as a reply and I implore you to explore why communications appear to be so few and far between.
I've been the bad guy my whole life [as a Christian straight white male] so don't think this is anything more than just another day in the let down humanity pushes upon its children.
I'm used to it, the children [mine and now yours] are the ones suffering from those that continue to throw stones while living in glass houses well after my time to want to be in the spotlight has already passed.
Vulgarity is not having a different opinion or using a curse word.
An insult is not relaying understanding of a different perspective.
Your visceral reaction to my airing of an opinion then wielding your emotional persuasion when choosing to include and then later disclude parents from formal incremental life events as if to award, punish, or wield control is vulgar.
You are only limiting the experiences, free will, and free thought of those that live in the shadow cast by your pedestal that you propose you are protecting from little old misinformed insensitive granddaddy and father of he, then others, who came from my seed.
You are the vessel of my lineage as bearer of the child of my son.
Your children, my Junior, and upon marriage, you, will become one of two branches from the trunk of my family tree by law, religion, and common practice of western culture.

Enjoy.

Hey Jr., had to be said & you know it.
Think "red flag, on fire, screaming at me - but I didn't listen".
Call me...

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